“I’d love to meet you and get to know you better,” Fireman said to me during our first phone call. He said it again on our second call. Then again on our third. I didn’t answer the fourth time he called. Fireman had contacted me almost immediately after I uploaded my new profile to Match.com. I don’t normally engage in multiple, back and forth, telephone calls when meeting someone through an online dating site. E-mails and phone calls prior to meeting someone tend to do one thing – build expectations. You can’t be disappointed if you don’t have expectations. So I make it a habit to schedule the “introductory coffee date” as soon as possible. Fireman had become an exception to my rule. After all, he is a fireman. With an ever-changing, highly unusual, schedule. Besides, he “threatened” to be in uniform for our first date. I was going to see that threat through to completion!
So I let it slide when he didn’t set a firm date for us to get together after our first call. On our second, he set a date and time but, on our third, he cancelled and said “but I really can’t wait to meet you and get to know all about you.” So I asked flat-out, “When would you like to reschedule?” There were some mumbles and something about shifts at the station but no plans were made. So when the fourth call came, I didn’t answer. If he had genuinely wanted to meet me he would have made firm plans. Had he genuinely wanted to get to know all about me, he would have asked me questions during our calls instead of talking about him. What he wanted, I didn’t know. And I didn’t care. He wasn’t genuine and that is a red flag I don’t ignore.
I’ve realized that, over the past four months, you have gotten to know a lot about me but I know hardly anything about you. I know the links you click on to find this blog. I know the search terms you use that find my blog (“How to Break a Stripper’s Heart” seems to be one of the most frequently used search terms leading you here. Seriously?!) But, unlike Fireman, I’m genuine when I say that I would like to get to know more about you.
I can’t make a full announcement just yet – but will hint at the fact that there are some new, very exciting, adventures related to this website that are coming – soon! For these endeavors to be truly beneficial to everyone, I need to know my readers. I’m looking for 5-10 people to interview to get to know, married/single/somewhere in-between, about their personal journey with dating and relationships. The interview is 100% confidential and won’t be lengthy, or formal, and can occur via telephone or in person (whatever makes you feel the most comfortable.) It’s truly just an informal chat so that I can determine how this blog can best serve you, its readers!
Anyone contacting me (via the comment section to this post, or directly at Rita@singlesinthesuburbs.com) volunteering to be interviewed will be entered to win a prize, from a group of options that I will send prior to the drawing! You need to submit your name no later than January 18th at 5pm Eastern.
I am SO excited about all that is set to happen in 2012 and think you will enjoy it all even more than me! I really can’t wait to meet you and get to know all about you!
Hear from you soon!